I am learning the hard way that life will never flow easily. You will never spend every day with the people that you love, and that there is always a upside to everything. I know now that when I feel like I have nothing left, and no one to talk to, I can walk in my room, pray to my Heavenly Father, and feel his spirit in my heart, and in my mind long enough to put my trials and sadness at ease. I have never done this before. I know now that I don't have to endure everything on my own, and like Jesus Christ: got sent an angel to help Him in the garden, Doctrine and Covenants promises in section 84:88, and whoso receiveth you, there I will be also. For I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up. I love this scripture and I read it often because I have found myself in hard places on my mission. I always heard it wouldn't all be easy and fun, but now, Ii know of assurance that it is difficul, and that is how I want it. This is a trial. My cousin, Justin, promised me in a note he wrote in the journal he gave me: Immediately after the greatest trials, will come the greatest blessings, so here I am to endure the trials, and here I am, hopefully, to receive those blessings.